Abram's Family Feud

Sermon By: Bruce Zimmerman

Written By: Amy Adams

This sermon went over Genesis 13:5-18: “Now Lot, who went with Abram, also had flocks and herds and tents. And the land could not sustain them while dwelling together, for their possessions were so great that they were not able to remain together. And there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the herdsmen of Lot’s livestock. Now the Canaanite and the Perizzite were dwelling then in the land. So Abram said to Lot, ‘Please let there be no strife between you and me, nor between my herdsmen and your herdsmen, for we are brothers. Is not the whole land before you? Please separate from me; if to the left, then I will go to the right; or it to the right, then I will go to the left.’ Lot lifted up his eyes and saw all the valley of the Jordan, that it was well watered everywhere- this was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah- like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt as you go to Zoar. So Lot chose for himself all the valley of the Jordan, and Lot journeyed eastward. Thus they separated from each other. Abram settled in the land of Canaan, while Lot settled in the cities of the valley and moved his tents as far as Sodom. Now the men of Sodom were wicked exceedingly and sinners against the Lord. The Lord said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, ‘Now lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; for all the land which you see, I will give it to you and to your descendants forever. I will make your descendants as the dust of the earth, so that if anyone can number the dust of the earth, then your descendants can also be numbered. Arise, walk about the land through its length and breadth; for I will give it to you.’ Then Abram moved his tent and came and dwelt by the oaks of Mamre, which are in Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.”

Covid-19 has caused some friction and tension among families. Whether it be to wear a mask or not, get the vaccine or not get the vaccine have written off some family members as thinking the other is crazy. Family feuds are in the Bible. We’ve got some friction and tension like in Abram’s day. These testaments were given as examples so we could learn from them. Abram and Lot had some tension. It reminds me that when it comes to friction in families, every relationship has friction in it: in families and even spouses. The problem with Abram was too much livestock and not enough land. The more you have, the more there is to fight over. Sometimes we think if we just had more, there would be less trouble but it’s often that when you have more, you’ll find more trouble. If there is a will there is a way. Usually, if there’s a will, there’s a problem. When someone dies, the family goes crazy and starts fighting over their inheritance, causing a power struggle. James 4:1-3 says: “You desire but you do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.”

“The heart of the problem is the problem of the heart,” said Warren Wiersbe. When there is tension, there is an obvious vulnerability to having an attack come upon us. The Canaanites and the Perizzites were foes to Abram. This left an opportunity for the enemy to fracture and destroy and take advantage of the situation when Abram and Lot separated. Sometimes people do drugs to take away the tension from stressful situations. A wearing down of our bodies makes us more susceptible to disease and attacks upon us. Jealousy and bitterness can take root as well.

Family friction should not be ignored. In Genesis 13:8, 9 Abram takes the lead and talks to Lot about separating so there wasn’t strife between them. What’s the answer he proposed? To put a little distance between them. He acknowledged there was a problem, acted on the problem, addressed the problem not the person, affirmed the relationship, and affirmed a solution. Acts 15:39, 40 talks about a problem between Paul and Barnabas: “They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company. Barnabas took Mark and sailed for Cyprus, but Paul chose Silas and left, commended by the believers to the grace of the Lord.”

What eased the pain of that solution, Abram was generous and magnanimous to the situation. He yielded his rights to Lot. Abram trusted in God and Proverbs 10:22 says: “The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, without painful toil for it.” It’s not money that makes a man rich but the blessing of the Lord. He knew he had the blessing of God and would be taken care of. He then accepted Lot’s decision. Phillipians 2:3, 4 says, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” Jesus yielded Himself and surrendered Himself to the Father’s plan of death on a cross to save us. You choose. You decide.

A lot of tension and strife would be eased if we had generous spirits. The relationship is more important. What this passage does is show Abram’s trust in God by him yielding and being willing to surrender land to Lot. This family friction has clarified what’s the most important to Lot and us: what we value most. Lot was not concerned for Abram, but for himself. Lot was focused upon what he saw and started salivating over it. It was absolutely selfish and Lot chose for himself. Self-interest is not the way to live life. “Love not the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world—lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.” 1 John 2:15, 16.

When Lot chose the land, he was short-sighted. He chose those resources for the wealth he could gain but didn’t consider what he was risking. Lot was seduced with the lushness of the valley. Proverbs 6:27-28 says, “Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched?” Lot chose the things that appealed to his flesh, his eyes and his pride thinking that he could avoid the danger being close to Sodom. That’s what consumed him. These family tensions reveal what’s most important to us. Abram settled and was at peace. The strife ended between them and the best solution was to put some distance between them. Both of them settled down. Sometimes the best way to get things settled is to separate.

The passage ends and called us to worship the promises of God. Trust God for provisions, protection and progeny. It reminded Abram that the dust under his feet was a promise from God that his descendants would be numerous like the dust. The Lord is calling us to worship Him and not to forget His promises. God has forever promises for you and the proper response for you is to worship Him. He gives us everlasting life. “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19. There might be friction in the family but you will never be separated from God.